Oct 17, 2006

DOOL - Monday - IT'S NOT EVEN THAT SERIOUS.

O RLY?

That's what Bo needs at the office - just a big old T-shirt with O RLY? scrawled on it. That's his whole attitude.

So, I really liked yesterday. I think they are trying to show more of people on the job, slowly but surely, which was the same reason I loved Hope and Abe talking about her work last week. I often forget Hope is actually a cop herself, as opposed to some vestigial appendage of Bo which escaped his body one night when he was drunk and throwing up after another night of homosexual panic among the Merchant Marine. I will give them time and latitude as to setting up showing more of people's occupations, as they are still cleaning out old plots. Though I have loved what I've seen of Kate in the office. For years, I wrote Lauren Koslow off as the worst caricature of soap acting, all simpering and purring every line and batting fuck-me eyes at nearly fiftysomething; I mean, that's all Kate's been for a long time. But in just a brief time, in those scenes with E.J., she's been more interesting than she's been in maybe a decade to me, and a lot of that is owed to the sparkling dialogue, but LK has also made it work too.

Don't that bitch know I's endangered?

Chelsea's plan was damn stupid and she looked completely ridiculous, like some kind of Muppet Show, grades K through 8 version of a hooker, and I swear to God that was a tauntaun skin she was wearing as a coat. And did she have to ply her wares on Sesame Street in broad daylight? Because that's what that set looked like. But all faking aside, don't play like it didn't occur to you right after the bust that you could've made a few extra dollars on a few rounds of oral, Chels. Like, "Oh snap! Why didn't I draw this shit out?" That's okay, girl. Hindsight. Hindsight. Seriously, I have swiftly gone from seeing Chelsea as a ridiculous, nevershouldalived irredeemable Teen Antichrist to an actually compelling character. Hogan's writing has already done did it for me, starting with those scenes with Stephanie that could've been a rote young bitchfest and turned into something else more honest and benevolent. And the scenes with Kate were great, even if the values the two espoused were not the best and Chelsea needs to get the fuck over Bo/Billie. So, I'm looking fwd to the char's future, even if a few more dumb stunts like this have to come.



IT'S NOT EVEN THAT SERIOUS.


Damn, Abe, I've got a new game you and Lexie can play at home, it's called It's Not Even That Serious. I love James Reynolds and think he's a great actor but now I'm not just scared of Abe when he finds Lexie, say, getting done up the butt by the pest control man, I'm scared of Abe all the time. What the fuck was that in the restaurant? Fists all up and flailing when Tek Produces The Ring? He's gonna trash the place! I love it! Abe, Abe, Abe. Abe! It's Not Even That Serious. And Tek, stop pretending like you want anything other than to not have to go back to being an unemployed former studio dancer from The Grind. "Marry me, Lexie! Come be Mr. Tek...whatever my last name is! I can be a contract player, we can be the black tentpole couple, we can do this!" In other, inconsequential news, I also loved Lexie and Abe's dialogue at the restaurant. "Want to marry me, have the most adorable kid in the world and live happily ever after?" Ooooh stop playing DiMera squeeeee!!!

Mimi and Bo's convo was great, and funny. "Please make sure Shawn doesn't catch a disease." And Bo learned a new word! "Condense." Seriously, though, it was delightful, despite Mimi being dressed like a Maoist or something. What was that about? I love that Bo still wanders around the office like Detective Casual Motherfucker. Paper cup clutched in his teeth like a damn animal, hair everywhere, wearing what looked like a CBGBs shirt, it's okay! Starting fights with the other officers, being surly and in his own place, stealing the files, it's okay! Until Abe spanks him. Bo: It Is That Serious.

I loved Kayla and Billie's conversation, too; again, it was adult and honest without being some juvenile bitchfest like the DOOL we know all too well. I love that Billie is rocking her gender-neutral, sexually-unthreatening Shirley MacLaine @ The Children's Hour ponytail and brown clothes. "I want you to know my box is not hot for Stnick today. Well, right now. At this moment. In the last hou...ten minutes. I await the arrival of an even more raw-ass man than he, perhaps one who has lost both eyes, or a finger, or a hand, to fuck me proper." Back off, Billie! Kayla and her various stolen Purple Rain ensembles have you in check. Game: Blouses.

How about you and your friends...take on me...and the Revolution.

Also, um, I like Shayna Rose a lot, I think she's a great, unique hire for daytime, but seriously, can they dial back on the OMG CUTE FAMBLY!!!11 stuff with her and the parents. She's coming off too Hayley Mills in The Parent Trap. At any moment, I expect her to break out with "Ain't I a stinkah?"

Okay. I'm out.

Shoot the J! SHOOT IT!! Good hustle.

Now is probably a good time to mention - or, you know, months ago would've been good too - that I shamelessly gank almost all my DOOL pix from Sheryl's Days Of Our Lives 2 MSN group and The Early Edition. Now watch me have gotten her name wrong. Damn. Damn!

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