Y&R - BFFs

This post pretty much guarantees I will never work for Y&R or any soap opera. Appreciate the sacrifices I make for you!

LLB: OHMYGOD, CHRISTIAN!
CLB: Wha-who?
LLB: Chris-shun, it's me, Lauralee!
CLB: Who in the he--what you talkin' bout, gurl?
LLB: Hello! Chrishun, Lauralee Bell, former co-star, stop playing around!
CLB: Sweetie, I don't know who you are and you do not have a penis and I am busy.
LLB: Oh, you have not lost your wit! It's ever so refreshing! I miss hearing it on a daily basis!
CLB: I am witty, this is true. You tell the truth. Talk some more about me.
LLB: I still watch the show! Everyday! I put on my housecoat and I watch and you are fab!
CLB: YES, I AM! Housecoats are not. Reconsider. And go on. More me! More ME!
LLB: Okay, um, oh I love your chemistry with your brother, he is a cutie!
CLB: Ain't that the truth! Cute everywhere, if you know what I'm sayin' [pause] you probably don't, you kinda vac-u-ous.
LLB: The only vac I know is a vaccuum! Haha!
CLB: Right. But listen here, KEV-IN, if that is your real name, this is MY show, MY limelight, bitch if you even stoort to think this is your show I will cut you! I will cut you down!
LLB: I--I don't think he's here.
CLB: I know he's not here! I'm not blind, Loralei, I just like to remind the Uni-verse that he's beneath me! Or under me, or on top of me. Whichever which way. Why the hell am I talking to you? What is going on? Where is my publicist? PUB-LEE-CIST!
LLB: I was hoping we could [gestures to camera] take a picture.
CLB: Oh. Check my teeth, honey.
LLB: They're good.
CLB: They better be. Now I still don't know who you is, gurl, but I bet I fucked ya ex-boyfriend.
LLB: Wha--
CLB: Cheese!