Jul 29, 2006

Y&R - Friday - I'm the Jug--oh, forget it

Nick: Hey Noah, come here buddy. Have a seat.
Noah: Yes, dad?
Nick: I know you're pretty sad right now, I understand, my parents went through the same thing when I was a kid.
Noah: They did?
Nick: Yeah, like 10 times. Anyway, I was thinking maybe you could live with me for right now.
Noah: Where are you living?
Nick: Uh--you know Daniel's mom?
Noah: Mrs. Abbott? Yeah...
Nick: With her.
Noah: Huh? Why?
Nick: She's pregnant. With my baby. Your little brother or sister! Isn't that dope?
Noah: You want me to live with you and your baby's mom?
Nick: Well...yeah, buddy! It'll be fun! She's a cool chick, her fridge is like full of candy, she never makes me put the toilet seat down AND she has a PS3! From Japan!
Noah: Aww Fuck Yeah! Mom, pack my shit!

I don't hate Nick and Phyllis but they are coming across as rather odious, aren't they? What next? Naming the baby "Sharon"? "What, bitch? You don't OWN the name! Step off! Watch us fuck! On your couch! Watch!". But Sharon didn't mind letting Brad suck her neck as Nick watched, did she? Hmmm. The cesspool of classlessness that is Genoa City.

Speaking of pools, look at what I found! Brad's diary! It's a very interesting read. Very, um, enlightening.



If Brad's mom is old enough to have been involved in stolen Nazi art 60 years ago then I have a vagina. And I'm pretty sure I don't have a vagina. Lemme check.

[tick tock]

Nope, no vagina. Nice try, show!

Brad: We're going to Hawaii!
Victoria: Wh--Why?
Brad: Because I wanna!
Victoria: Okay!

Whoareyou?! Are you new? Are you retarded or somethin'? I'm the Juggernaut, bitch, I will stomp you!



"That joke is tired, son."
"I know but it's new for soaps!"
"Yeah but..."
"I know."
"Still, that chick is new."
"Brand new."
"New car smell new."

Oh and the results of our little Alex poll. Jack White won by a landslide! Except he didn't, I just wanted to say that. But he DID win and with that he doesn't get a fucking thing. Thanks for participating everybody!



7 comments:

smartyshorts said...

Darn, forgive me, I totally DID think you had a vagina. Like a spare you could wear with your most fly of hats.
I'm sitting at work, I'm the only one on the desk so I can't even leave to go to the bathroom. And I have to pee.
And reading the entry from Brad's diary has just put me in a critical dilemma. So thanks for that.
And is hawaii the new hideout spot? can I go?

Yeah, the Phyllick is now so SO tacky. But, I'm a sucker for Shirtless Nick, and Hummina Hummina...Phyllis' legs! Yowsa!

kia112 said...

That conversation between Nick and Noah could never happen because Nick doesn't know Noah's name. It's always "dude." Always and forever.

Darn said...

You're right, I should have remembered that. Just like Sharon is never "Sharon", she's "Babe".

Darn, forgive me, I totally DID think you had a vagina. Like a spare you could wear with your most fly of hats.

Oh, I have a spare. I keep it in my backpocket. You never know when you'll need a spare vagina, what if I run out of change?!

Ask me what that means and I won't be able to answer.

I'm sitting at work, I'm the only one on the desk so I can't even leave to go to the bathroom. And I have to pee.
And reading the entry from Brad's diary has just put me in a critical dilemma. So thanks for that.


This, this right here is my objective. I'm here to fuck up your bladder.

janie said...

The Brad story was something of a...letdown, shall we say. It feels like the writers were scrambling. "Quick! What's a secret, mysterious past we've never used before? Nazis? Yes, good, good, but what else?"

You know?

Darn said...

"So, you guys, we need an evil regime that isn't the mafia, Y&R viewers rejected the mafia last time."

"Al-Queda?"

"Too political."

"Communists?"

"Too Cuban."

"Soviets?"

"Too Communist. Which is too Cuban. And Russian. And you don't get to talk anymore."

"Hey! Nazis! Who doesn't hate Nazis?"

"Genius!"

Basically, I agree. And the timeline is pushing it really, really hard.

Arugula said...

The timeline is keerayzee! Brad's mother would need to be 80 AT LEAST (more like 90) to make this SL remotely believeable ... and that woman wasn't 80. It's so strange that they reached that far back to dig up a "bad guy."

The whole Q&A between Brad and Colleen and her remembering her world history ... that was just gross too.

Colleen has the biggest friggin yapper in town. Brad's secret probably got out before they even got on the plane. She probably stopped at McDonalds for some fries and told all the cashiers in there.

Anyhow, DARN, I luuurve the diary entry you found. It's just perfect!

smartyshorts said...

Well the actress is close to 70, but she looks about 3 years older than BradBot.
And Darn, my baldder is now your mortal enemy. I tried to talk it down, but to no avail. It will never forgive your Betrayal!

Everyone to the Honeycomb Hideout. The Naziis will never find us there