Aug 21, 2006

Y&R - Monday - Hindenburg? "I HAD TO SMOKE!"



Gloria on the Titanic: Ships go down ALL THE TIME! I'VE CHIPPED A NAIL! FOR GOD'S SAKE, HAVE SOME PRIORITIES, JAA-AAA-AAACK!

Gloria on Nuremberg: I danced for a few gentlemen in NUREMBERG, they tipped WELL, THEY'RE GOOD PEOPLE! STOP JUDGING THEM, JAAA-AA-AAAAACK! I KNOW FROM PAIN!

Gloria on Chernobyl: I was there, JAAA-AAA-AAA-AACK! I HAVE THE SCARS TO PROVE IT! I was behind iiiiiiiiit! No, no, you didn't hear that! YOU DIDN'T HEAR THAT, JAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACK!


Today was the first day that I wanted to physically hurt Gloria. I can't wait until John's funeral! Only because, with any hope Gloria will jump in the casket with him. Jack (or Peter Bergman) was SOOOO close to telling her "TOUGH SHIT!" when she was going on about John's funeral. Loved it.

I know that all I could think of after my grandfather died was fucking somebody. Okay. Yeah, blah, blah, blah death makes you want to feel alive. Whatever. Shut up, JT. Like you know about losing a grandparent, your deepest story on this show involved your girlfriend having a miscarriage during a commercial break.

But BOY is JT gonna make a mess. He's been saving up for that girl for damn near 5 years. Get ready for some clean up, Col.

Yeah, yeah, Nick and Phyllis are gonna have a girl. And she's gona have red hair. And she'll be sickeningly precocious. And her name will be...Casey. Why don't they just fuck on her grave? JUST FUCK ON HER GRAVE!

Sharon: My gosh, I've never been in a scene with so many black people before! This is different. When do we dance?

And of course she joins the scene and it become All About Sharon. When is Sharon not suffering from PTSD? Every other Saturday? Matt Clark, Cameron Kirsten and now guy's whose name I don't even know. Poor, poor, LilBastard.

Oh no, Lily's stuck on stupid again. What made her think any member of her family would be okay with Daniel being there? We do not need Christel Khalil levels of dumb on this show again. I think Sharon is quite enough for the next decade. BUT she won me over when after Devon said "I got you something to remind you how special you are." she said "Boy, I already know I'm special, I don't need no reminding but thanks!". Love, love, love.

And THE MOTHACLUCKIN' BEST for last! The Return--THE RETURN OF--DUN, DUN, DUNDUN--
FAN!




Fan, Fan, how have you been? What have you been up to?
Fan: Just doin' what I do, baby. You know.
Ya look good, ya look great.
Fan: You always say things that I know! But thank you, thank you kindly.
So where were you for so long?
Fan: You know Vicky, she's got her plans, I got mine. Schedules, schedules. But finally that one week something gelled and everything worked out well.
So any return trips in the near future?
Fan: I dunno, I don't know. You gotta ask Lynn or Vicky, I go where life takes me. I'm a free spirit! You know how I do, YOU KNOW!

10 comments:

kia said...

Sharon: My gosh, I've never been in a scene with so many black people before! This is different. When do we dance?

Bwaahhaaa!

Dee said...

Sharon: My gosh, I've never been in a scene with so many black people before! This is different. When do we dance?

*DEAD*

smartyshorts said...

What made her think any member of her family would be okay with Daniel being there?

I had the feeling Lily was testing Daniel. To see if he'd be willing to sit there and sweat through a dinner with her parents to prove he loves her. I know I grasp at straws, but they are GOOD straws.

I'm feeling your pain about WonkyEyes, I refuse to share what I did while she ranted on and on about how Jack convinced her to KILL John, and how John's funeral needed to be blah blah blah with a marching band and a chocolate fountain. Lets just say there are a LOT of broken pencils and ripped phone books in my house right now.
I wanted to put her on a ventilator and then turn that shit off. Then wheel her body all through the hospital singing "Ding Dong the witch is Dead!"
She could go out to the (presumed) rice paddies of rural Vietnam and bring Keemo back, and Katie AND Heather. She could kill Breorge with her fucking THIGHS at this point. She could magically bring back Heather Tom as Victoria, and I would STILL hate the bitch. (Okay, maybe not that last one....no, never mind, I'd still hate her)

janie said...

You know what bothers me most about Gloria/Judith Chapman? Even more than the crazy eyes? It's the way she delivers her lines, the way she hardly EVER moves her top lip, but her bottom jaw is constantly jutting out and her bottom lip is always pouty and shuddery, and it just drives me NUTS for some reason.

I'm not explaining it well, but you know what I'm referring to. It's weird. ::hates::

arugula said...

Sharon: My gosh, I've never been in a scene with so many black people before! This is different. When do we dance?

Bahahahha! Darn, you crack me up. I needed a laugh, too, after all this sadness about John's death.

That fan stuff was great, too. The fan and the white hat thing ... that was some combo!

arugula said...

Oh, Darn, I forgot to say ... since you love Gloria so much, I'm sure you adored how the two pictures she brought into John's hospital room were of (1) her and John and (2) herself. Ha! No pictures of his kids or others in the family -- just her!

Darn said...

That's our Glo, selfish to the core. I really have no problem imagining her drying her nails as Tom beat Kevin. See no evil, hear no evil until she looks in the mirror and takes her fingers out of her ears.

I never noticed that, janie but am so gonna look out for it. A new reason to hate Gloria is a new reason to live.

smartyshorts said...

The worst acting tic of Gloria/Judith Chapman for me is the head tilt. When she's especially angry whiplash is a possibility. I can't wait for the funeral, maybe she will snap her own damn neck. I can't wait to see what she considers appropriate widow's funeral attire.
The veil people, envisage the VEIL!

Kaboom said...

I am sure we will all be [KC]Dear GOD in Heaven![/KC] when we get that first glimpse of Glo in her funeral attire. I'm betting that there will be some kind of animal print somewhere on that outfit.

Does she know of Zapato's existence yet? Bitch will no doubt rub those claws of hers in anticipation of having him skinned.

Pandora said...

I'm betting that there will be some kind of animal print somewhere on that outfit.

Yeah, an animal print veil. "WAAAAAAAAATTT? DON'T YOU LIKE MY VEIL, JAAAAAAAAAACK?? IF JOHN WERE HERE, HE WOULD WAAAAAAAAAAAAANT ME DO WEAR IT! HE WAS MY HUUUUUUUUSBAAAAAAAAAAAAAND!!!